Just a thingy...

I thought of this while on Twitter earlier but it's too long to tweet, so I'm putting it here. Enjoy!


I am Jesus, Prince of Jerusalem, and defender of the secrets of Castle Bethlehem. This is John, my "fearless" friend.  Fabulous secret powers were revealed to me the day I held aloft my magic cross and said, "By the power of Bethlehem!" I have the power!



Yeah I know it's silly, but I still think it's pretty funny. Whatever

Why I fucking hate orange Starburst...

Well, Halloween is here again and with Halloween comes with bulk pack of fun-size candies.  And one of my favorite fun-size versions of candy is Starburst.  Damn this candy rocks, it's all stiff and juicy all at the same time, fuckin' delicious.  But you know what doesn't rock about it? The fucking orange ones. I don't know what it is about orange candy but it never tastes right. Oh sure, the other flavors don't exactly taste perfectly like their actual fruit counterparts, but at least they put effort into making those guys taste delicious.  With orange stuff, they always fucking suck, and orange Starbursts are the worst.  Especially in the fun-size packages.  Out of the last 3 two packs I opened, I got four orange ones. That's right, one pack was two orange ones.  At least with the other two I actually got a flavor I wanted, but with this double-orange abomination, I left with nothing, and they get left on the microwave for some other poor bastard that, because of some sort of apparent mental defect, actually enjoys the flavor!  And by now you're probably saying "Well, you get four orange ones in the regular size package!", yes, but again, I also get 12 awesome tasting ones out of that, but with the fun-size ones, I only got two! It's bullshit!



P.S. Totally forgot to mention that Chocolate Oranges are the ONE exception to sucky orange flavored candies...

A few words on the last post.

As you might have read, the post from the other night was actually only part one of a two part story. Wellllllll, that has changed.  Since pegging is not something I have personally experienced(either physically or visually), it's a little hard for me to write about the actual act itself, so for the time being i have decided to have the story be it's own little self contained tale.  I may come back to it sometime in the future, but for the time being, let's all just enjoy it for what it is! :) Also, I've always found that implication can be super hot in it's own right, so with that, I'll see you all again soon! :)

Late night ideas are some of the best ideas....

Like some of you, I tend to do my best thinking in the shower.  However I was quite surprised when my latest story idea, which you will be reading shortly, popped into my head right before I fell asleep last night.  Like my other work so far, it is the first of its kind for me, so I apologize in advance if it's not quite up to snuff with the others of its ilk.  It's also shaping up to be the most graphic thing I've written so far, so obviously, NSFW roads lie ahead.  Enjoy, pervs! :)

Her Pet: A Story of Submission

By Xander Grimm

 He sits waiting, on his knees, in the middle of the room.  He has been stripped naked, his hands bound behind his back, the light glinting off of both the ring on his collar and the rings pierced through his nipples.  His skin tingles with anticipation has the clacking of his mistress' heels on the hallway floor grows louder, and closer.  He inhales sharply, his self-control stretched to the breaking point as his brain commands his cock not to rise at the sight of her.

 His eyes travel first to her face, piercing green eyes set under glossy black hair, that, when not set into its current ponytail, reaches down past her perfect, supple ass cheeks.  His eyes gaze down further, past her ruby red lips, settling on her ample breasts, her nipples pierced with emerald-colored studs, her toned stomach accentuated by the jeweled dolphin pierced through her navel.  When his gaze reaches her pelvis, the sight he beholds causes his self-control to snap momentarily, his cock hardening halfway before being sent flaccid again by a surge of will-power from his brain.  The harness is a shiny black, stark against the smooth, light brown skin of his mistress. The cock she has chosen tonight is the pet's favorite, a bright red translucent dick, and the perfect mixture of length and girth.

 His eyes finally come to rest at her feet, sheathed in glossy black stilettos, her toes painted the same shade of red as the cock.   He keeps his gaze on her approaching footsteps, breathing slowly in self-control.  Red-tipped fingers caress his face and cup his chin, lifting his eyes towards hers.

"Are you ready, my pet?", she coos softly.

A Blast From The Past....

Hey gang, here's something a little different for you today; A prologue for a book idea that I came up with a few years ago. Obviously, i wasn't using the "Xander Grimm" handle back then, but I changed it so that it fits in with the rest of the stuff on here. Also, the idea is geared more towards the young adult crowd, so sorry if it's not quite as spicy as my other material. Never the less, enjoy!

Time in Crisis: Book One: T-Flux

By Xander Grimm

Prologue: July 16, 2006

They say that when something bad is going to happen, the animals are always the first to know. Nate Greenfield wasnt sure if he believed that statement or not, or who "they" was for that matter. What he was sure of was that something very strange was going on, and his livestock were certainly aware of it. What Nate first noticed was that it was incredibly windy for a July morning, even though the weather had been getting progressively worse over the past few years. But what happened next took Nates mind off of the wind. The air in front of him literally ripped open, with a sound that reminded Nate of cartoons where the characters where so fat that when they bent over, the seat of their pants tore open.

Emanating from the hole was a brilliant white light, so bright in fact that Nate had to shield his eyes against it.

"Oops, sorry about that," said a friendly sounding voice, "I always forget that you guys are a lot more sensitive to light than we are." The light quickly faded, and as Nate lowered his arm, he saw that the hole was gone as well. In its place was a man about as tall as Nate was. As a matter of fact, the man looked remarkably similar to Nate, the main difference between the two men was that the newcomer had a lot more hair then Nate, not to mention the white lab coat the man was wearing, as compared to the overalls Nate had on.

"Wh-Who the hell are you?" Nates whole body was shaking, both in fear and complete disbelief. "Where the hell did you come from?"

The man smiled and laughed a little. "Who I am and where Im from is inconsequential. Whats important is that you get this device to Professor Kirkus at the university." The man held up a strange looking contraption, something that Nate hadnt noticed before now.

Nate looked at the man in confusion. "What is it?"

"That is not for you to know, at least not at this point. Just make sure that it gets to him as soon as possible." The mans voice, which had been kind and pleasant just a moment before, had taken on a serious tone. He then handed the device to Nate, who almost dropped it, having miscalculated its weight.

"Damn, this thing is heavy." Nate strained to keep it from falling onto the ground.

The man smiled. "Yes, that it is. Take care Nate, and make sure that device makes it into the hands of Professor Kirkus."

Nate nodded. "Sure thing." The man nodded at him and began to turn away, and as he did, the light from the sun caught on his nametag, allowing Nate to read it. "What the hell?"

The sound of tearing pants bounced off of Nates eardrums once more as the hole in space reopened and the man in the white lab coat stepped through it. "Good luck, Nate!" And with that, as quickly as he had appeared the man was gone.

The last thing that Nate saw in his mind before his eyes rolled back into his head and his body crashed to the ground was the wording on the mysterious visitors nametag. "Head of Research and Development: Nathan D. Greenfield."

MMM...Synopsis...Also, you guys rock!

Hey gang, Xander here.  First of all, let me thank all of you for the kind words and support that you have expressed for my writing.  The response to Ayane's intro story has been overwhelming, so much in fact that I have been inspired to expand her character into a full length novel.  Because this is my first book I don't have much in mind about a development schedule, however I do plan on posting the first few parts on here so that you can get a taste of the awesomeness to come.  I will also be posting other ideas that I come up with in the meantime, and hope to have a couple of posts up a week, depending on how my mind is working.  So, stay tuned and I hope you enjoy what you read! In the meantime, I leave you with my novel's synopsis, to help whet your appetites for the things to come. Enjoy!
 

“Hair of the Dog: The First Novel from Xander Grimm”

Plot Synopsis

                Ayane Delgado, half-vampire hottie extraordinaire, has spent the past several months making a name for herself as a private detective and bounty hunter, catering to both humans and supernaturals alike.  So when Ian Matthews, the head of Las Vegas’ werewolf sect and sometimes lover of Ayane, shows up at her apartment with news of his daughter’s kidnapping, she is more than willing to take the case, both to cement her place as an expert detective and to help out her close friend.  However, what at first glance appears to be an open and shut case takes a dark turn as another werewolf child is abducted and people close to Ayane begin to perish in mysterious accidents.  Soon, the young detective finds herself face to face with things thought to exist only in legends, and revelations that could shatter all that she has grown up to believe.  Facing both old weaknesses and new strengths, Ayane will find herself in the fight of her life, a fight that will force her to do the one thing she has never done before: Embrace the full power of her vampiric heritage.

My own blog, and its first story.

So as some of you may know, Ruby Violence's awesome horror themed blog(horrorloversspot.blogspot.com) is home to the stories involving Michelle Masters. However, I have other stuff that I am also working on, and rather than bog down her site with all my various ramblings, I decided to start up my own place for them. So, here ya go, the introduction to my latest creation, Ayane Delgado. Enjoy! :D

                                                                        Spring Cleaning

By Xander Grimm

                A shotgun round at close range would decimate any normal human head.  But when you factor in several months of rot, the 20 gauge buckshot that Ayane Delgado fired into the nearest zombie’s skull shredded it into a pile of bone and gore like a month old jack-o-lantern being thrown from a moving car. She smirked to herself as she continued to fire round after round into the approaching horde,  never missing a shot, sometimes felling two or even three undead beasts if they were close enough together.  When the shotgun ran out of ammo, she simply dropped it; this particular horde was small enough to eliminate it with the other tools at her disposal, rather than wasting time reloading the bulky firearm.  She drew her 9mm semi-automatic pistol and emptied it into another group of zombies, replaced the clip, and emptied it as well.  Placing it back into the holster on her hip, she drew the WW2 Japanese officer’s katana from her back.  The sword had been a gift from her grandfather, and excelled at exterminating the undead.  The few remaining members of the horde were quickly dispatched, the razor sharp blade slicing cleanly through their necks and heads.

                “This go around was almost too easy,” Ayane said to herself as she walked over to where she had dropped her shotgun earlier in the fight, “it almost makes me wish there were different variants of the beasties, like in video games.  Then maybe they’d provide more of a challenge.”   She bent down to retrieve her weapon when a sharp stabbing sensation in her leg made her yelp.  She glanced down to see one of the zombies, torn in half by a shotgun blast, with its teeth buried in her flesh.  She snarled, her fangs protruding from her gums, her arm bringing the sword down to cleave its face in two.  “Motherfucker, and in my favorite pants.”

                Normally, a zombie bite would a death sentence for any everyday human, but like the filth she had just spent the better part of two hours exterminating, Ayane was anything but every day.  A genetic anomaly in the truest sense of the word, Ayane was a “daywalker”, half vampire, half human.  Yeah, she hated the word too, but if she beat up everyone who used in around her, she would be even more of an outcast, perhaps even pursued by authorities on both sides, and that just wouldn’t do.   Besides, she enjoyed the benefits she had been granted by this, the strangest of all genetic lotteries.  The zombie bite, while still painful, did not come with the same message of doom when inflicted onto someone with vampire DNA running through their veins.  It would heal quickly, leaving behind only the faintest of scars.

                Ayane grunted softly as she peeled off her tank top and jeans and tossed them into the back of her jeep along with her equipment, revealing a form hugging bra and boy short combination.  Loud music blared out of the speakers as she turned the engine over and began the drive home.  In almost any other city, driving around in such minimal clothing would turn heads everywhere she went.  But her penthouse was located in Las Vegas, and such things were accepted, if not expected. 

                A short time later, she pulled into her private garage and took the elevator up to her penthouse, a gift from her politician father.  First stop was the bathroom for a much needed shower.  As she stripped off her undergarments she caught sight of herself in the bathroom’s full length mirror.  Another benefit of only being half vampire was that she could actually cast a reflection, which saved a lot of work when it came to applying make-up, among other things.  Ayane was stunningly beautiful, her Asian-Hispanic ancestry coming together in a perfect amalgamation of exquisite features.  Her skin was a smooth golden brown, long black hair reaching down halfway to her rump, her pert, round breasts perched above a perfectly toned stomach, light glinting off the barbells pierced through her nipples.

                The hot water was an instant relief as it rushed over Ayane’s naked form, pulsing jets easing the pain in her back and shoulders.  She squirted a pool of shampoo into her palm and worked it throughout her hair before rinsing the suds and moving to her favorite part of any shower: washing her body.  Call her conceited, but the touch of her own hands upon her form turned Ayane on more than any man or woman ever had.  Reaching for her loofa, she applied a large amount of body wash, a formula of her own design to help not only mask odors, but also to enhance her body’s accelerated healing factor and leave it feeling smooth.  The frictionless gliding of the loofa over her tired frame sent jolts of pleasure up her spine, and she felt the area between her legs grow even warmer.  For a moment, she considered taking care of business right then and there, but decided against it.  The magic wand at the side of her bed had been neglected for several nights now, and tonight it would once again kiss her naked form in vibrating ecstasy.  She ended her shower early after rinsing off and wrapped a towel around her body, her hair tied up in a bun to dry.  Her slit continued to twinge softly with excitement as she finished drying off and laid herself down onto the soft, welcoming bliss of her king sized bed.  She smiled to herself as she reached for the wand, turning it onto its lowest setting and touching it lightly to her breast, gasping softly as the first waves of please worked their way down her torso.  She cranked the vibrations higher and gasped louder as she moved the wand down over her stomach, her hips arching into the air as the vibrating head settled down in between her legs, humming over her lips and clit, sending shockwaves of pleasure rocketing from her feet into her brain.  She cranked the vibrations to their maximum and screamed in ecstasy, her hips lifting completely off of the bed as her body racked with orgasmic bliss, her juices shooting out from her slit and pooling on the bed.   She collapsed in a heap, breathing heavily, a soft chuckle escaping her lips as she slowly powered the vibrator off and set it back onto the nightstand, the last rays of sunlight disappearing behind the ivory towers and flashing lights that made up Las Vegas.